Beef jerky be darned!!

Agh... I swear I am a 22 year old girl (I still don't consider myself a grown up or woman ha) in an 88 year old's body! All I did was eat one little tiny piece of peppered beef jerky and BAAAAM! I'm awake with the wooorst heartburn. It feels like I swallowed nail polish remover and the acetone is just creeping it's way up my throat. ugh. And to top it off, I've got a massive headache. And finished New Moon just a while ago so now I don't have anything to read. Am I pitiful or what?
Today was Jaycee's birthday party. I was extremely pleased that she liked her present Clark & I got her (memory card for her phone). It amazes me how much her and Jaydon have grown. I guess it's because I was only 11 going on 12 when she was born. She's the age now that I was when she was born! ha... And Jaydon... my little baby boy. He's so big and funny! He's the chubbiest most adorable kid ever! Oh and my other nephew Isaiah.. he's just too cute for words! He's so vocal now which just cracks me up. I can't wait for him to start walking just to see the things he's gonna get into! I thank God everyday for blessing me with those children b/c I know it'd be alot harder for me (and Clark) considering we prolly arent going to have kids.
So I started to knit about mmm 2 weeks ago? I've got knit, purl, (stockinette) stitches down. I am absolutely terrified of double pointed needles though. I was about half tempted to buy some at Wal*Mart yesterday but decided on getting some more circulars instead since my dog chewed up the bamboo one's I had. (Told you she was the devil)
I'm working on a scarf thing for my niece Jaycee right now. My goal is to somehow incorporate tiger stripes into the orange that I'm doing now. (Her school mascot is the tiger and she loves em) I'm just doing basic stockinette stitch except I'm switching it around so you can see the reversed side every ten rows or so. It's more or less just practice but if I can make something of it great!
So if anyone is reading this that can give me some tips, please do! I'm at a loss what to do. I've been searching the internet like crazy and anything I read or watch just doesn't seem to make sense.
Well, I'm off to try to get some sleep. As if I'll be able to with some massive burning going on inside right now. Ha.

Wet n mushy day...

So since the moment I woke up it's felt like Friday. And as any of you sane people know... it's not. Work was the usual accept on of the dr's wasn't in today which made it alot slower. (That's a good thing) I pretty much got through 3/4 of Twilight. I'm still loving it, probablly even more now. ha.
I don't know what exactly inspired this but lately I've become very interested in spinning. I've done a little research and just don't know if I'm coordinated enough to do it. Not to mention that my insane devil dog gets into every skein of yarn I get! I love her like a child but I honestly don't know what I would do if she tore up a skein that I spun myself... aagh I don't even want to think about it! lol
I've found some pretty good sites that are very educational but they all seem so... stiff? rigid? I dunno it doesn't seem to be clicking in my head how I will do it. It's probablly just me because I'm more of a visual learner. So I'm sure it's just my own stupidity that's keeping me from fully understanding it. I really don't want to get involved with another project or hobby and not be able to finish it up. I'm still learning how to knit, and not that great at it I may add, and also still trying to get better with crochet. Oh, and I also just got my sewing machine working... most of the time anyway. I'm still hopeful that Clark will get me a new one for my birthday even though we really can't afford it.
I'm still hopeful though that somehow I'll manage to get better at both knitting and crocheting. I have alot of free time since I'm such a homebody so who knows...

I should be cleaning

but I'm not! ha... go figure me not clean when I'm supposed to! =] Anywho, I don't know why I'm even posting anything. Nothing interesting has even happened. Not that nothing ever does to me so....

I'm still working on learning to knit. I haven't learned the purl stitch yet. Thank goodness b/c if I did I'm sure I'd screw it up. (yes Amanda, I'm doubting myself again haha) So far I've just made reeeeallly long garter stitch scarves lol. And it's frickin Spring! But at least I'm learning right? I used to think I couldnt ever learn how to crochet or knit so I'm just glad I'm broadening my horizons.

My Twilight book came today! *eeeeeks!* So I'm sure if I don't post anything for a day or two it's b/c I'm spending all my spare time reading. But who can blame me? I still can't believe I watched the movie first! I never ever do that! O well... I'm determined to read the whole series before seeing the next movie though!

So basically right now I really need to be...

1. Cleaning the spare room.
2. Dishes
3. Organizing/cleaning out my craft supplies (hehe)
4. Cleaning the porch off (altho it's really Clarks job)
5. Putting clothes away
6. Scrubbing the tub/shower/bathroom in general
7. Being more organized
8. Reading my book (going to as soon as I'm done w/this)
9. Reading the Bible (I'm determined to read it cover to cover w/in this year. I've never read it before)

Organizing bills and papers.

So yea that's about it! Can we say procrastination?!?! Oh, not to mention I could be cooking dinner right now also. I did make a step towards cleaning the spare room though, I brought boxes home from work. Ha small step but none the less more then what I had yesterday right?! Oh, forgot one more thing, I should be working on Clark's afghan. Poor thing I started it in DECEMBER!!! It's my first real project and I made sure to buy all the yarn and supplies for it and now ooops I've gotten distracted by all the other pretty fibers I have just staring at me from the dining room. Well, I suppose I'm going to quit stlaling and go do something well productive (ew its so bleh even typing it!). Dishes? Clothes? Crochet? Knit? *Sigh* The life I live!

Just call me Lemming

So I've always had this thing where I swear I'm not going to watch a movie that was from a book until I've read the book... ya kno I like to compare what they add in and leave out...all that jazz. So when Twilight came out and all these people were making a big hooplah about how wonderful it was I swore I wouldn't watch it until I read the complete series. Well, I caved this Saturday and thank God I did! It's everything everyone says and more! I am now a Twilight fanatic and in love with Edward Cullen! (I ordered the first book about 5 minutes after I finished watching the movie.)
Anyhow, I finally got something to organize my yarn and other things. It's still a work in progress but not to bad if I say so myself.

I keep all my yarn in this mesh organizer thing. Only $3! I'm going to get another one b/c this poor thing is sooo weighed down! Haha.

And as you can see I keep all of my odds and ends, hooks, needles and etc this plastic drawer organizer. (Also only $3!) But now my only problem is how to organize this...

Yea...that's the result of my dog CoCo and her hay day in my yarn stash... any tips much appreciated!
Well, off to finish watching Secret Life of an American Teenager finale and shower!

Before the day begins...

Quick post before I start my day! I'm taking Miss CoCo to the vet today...no worries she's just getting groomed. I got little pink bows about 2 weeks ago for them to put in her long wavy ear hair! =] I will most definitley post pics later of that!
My day is pretty much just going to consist of taking her to the vet, to work till 3, back to the vet to pick her up, them home or back to work depending on if I get back in time before we close work. Grocery store later... grumble grumble.
Let's see recap for the past few days or so... yesterday we had dinner over at the in laws. I can honestly say that I am truly blessed to have great in laws. April is such a strong Christian mother who is a great example for me to follow. Big Clark is pretty much what little Clark will be when he's older lol. He acts just like his dad and more and more of him comes out every day. Which isn't a bad thing cuz his dad's a great man. He's a good provider and a wonderful grandfather. We may not always agree (haha) but over all they are amazing people that I am grateful to have in my life.
Clark got me some great yarns this past weekend at the fleamarket. There's not a whole lot there (about 1/2 a skein on each yarn) but it's more then what I had before and I'm thankful I have a "husband" who thinks of me. I figure it's enough to make some flowers or edging on something.
I'm working on quite a few things right now. A ami monkey, stiiiilll on Clark's afghan (poor guy), preemie blanket (may turn it into a snuggie thingy), and preemie hat. I started out being one of those people who couldn't stand to do more then one project at a time, slowly went to having to have more then one, now it seems like I start a new one every night! Oh well, all is fair in crochet and war right?! lol
Well, I'm off to take her to get purdied up. I hope the medicine they gave me works for her car sickness as well this time as it did Saturday when we went to Mom's house. Wish me luck!

Spring, struggling, & savouring.

-Spring-

Well the weather has been absolutely gorgeous! Even today, it's not particularly sunny but its cool and breezy out. I love it! As much as I adore the snow and winter, Spring is my absolute favorite! I adore the new life in all the animals, and flowers. Color seems to always be better in the spring and everything seems to be just a little bit more cheery!

I had a great day yesterday with my best friend and family. Heather & I went to the mall where of course I spent more then I wanted to (as usual) but got some much needed stuff. Then we ate chinese. =] Enough said there! ha... Then after devouring a plate of carbs and msg, we went and walked it off in the park. Seeing all the puppies and dogs out made me feel like a bad mommy to my baby girl at home because I haven't taken her to the park yet. She gets sooo car sick so if I take her anywhere I spend most of the time when we get there cleaning her up. And she's so wore out from puking and just feeling bad that she just lays there sleeping and getting rest.

After a fun daytime with Heather I actually got to spend time with Clark and my parents. We went to the car show at the civic center which was more boring and more fun then I thought. Lol. More boring because I know nothing about cars but more fun because I saw more interesting things then I had thought I would. We all walked around together talking and staring at shiny things (my fave! lol) and we each picked out which one we would take home if we could. I, of course, chose a beautiful blue 64 mustang.



Overall, a good day.

-Struggling-

I've found myself lately struggling with my relationship with God. Not that I don't have faith, because I do. More so now then ever. Just that I don't quite know how to come the person that I know I am supposed to be. I think I have a good relationship with the Lord but I know it's nowhere where it's supposed to be. I'm not doing the things I should. It seems like I just don't quite know how to stay on the right track of things. I recently watched "Fireproof"

which I recommend to anyone and everyone no matter what walk of life you're in. It's got something for everyone. And of course it made me think. As most of those kinds of movies do. I just wish I could be the person I know that I'm supposed to be without struggle. Is it even possible? I feel like once I get on the right track, something pulls me back into my old bad ways. I know that I have it in me to be who I'm supposed to, I just continue to struggle with whether or not I have the strength to be that person.
I also have found myself struggling with my anxiety. It was going good but now it seems to be in a stand still. I feel the need to control everything. I can go places and do things that I couldn't before (thats the getting better part) but I have to drive, I have to be the one to choose to go to that place, I have to be the one saying when and where. (that's the stand still part) It seems like I can't give up any control of my life to anything anymore...
-Savouring-
Clark and I couldn't be better right now though. He has given me so much happiness and I thank God for every moment we have together. He has truly been my best friend and I just can't imagine life without him right now or ever for that matter. He's been so sweet and even if we do argue it doesn't seem to be that big of a deal anymore. I'm so grateful to have him as well as everyone else that I have, in my life. They truly keep me going...
Well, this is an odd way to end this kind of blog but its 9 something and I need to play with CoCo and go to bed...more later kids.