Monday, May 25, 2009

My lungs hate me

Pnemonia again... second time this year. Not only that but ear infections in both ears and bruised ribs from coughing so much. Seriously? Throw some more crap on my life! Bring it!

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Warning: Whiney Blog Ahead

As the title warns, this is going to be a horrible blog. So if you don't want to hear me complain then just look away now. There's going to be alot of complaining in this blog because it seems that everything that could possibly go wrong within the past week or so, has gone wrong.
Let's just start with the fact that my bank is a complete and total joke in every sense of the word!! Long story short (very long story short), I was told one thing about when I deposited my check into the bank about how much money would be available to me and when. Then, once I deposited my check on Thursday, they switched around and told me another which in turn made it look like I had overdrafted by $9. Okay big whoop. I was mad b/c they backtracked and said no no no this is our policy but ok they're a bank they do those things. So let's just say I did overdraw by a measley nine frickin bucks! Does that justify you charging me $148 in overdraft fees? I think not! Oh and it gets better from there. As of right now they have charged me around $500 in overdraft fees when I deposited a check of a little over $300 and spent about $260 some. Yea... take that in for a moment... FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS IN OVER DRAFT FEES!!! FOR NINE DOLLARS!! mmhmm do you see my frustration now? So I contact the bank and was quickly told so sorry can't help you the branch manager that takes off overdraft fees or can freeze it for you is on vacation until Tuesday. This was hrm... Monday maybe that I found this out? Yea.. out of a whoooole bank only one single soul can push that one button that stops the overdraft fees so I can get this straightened out. Needless to say, but I'm going to say it anyway, I'm going down there Tuesday to deal with this. I'll suck it up and pay the first overdraft fee, which according to my pamphlets they gave me when I got the checking account is $37, but they are not in no way getting any more money from me! I'm going to play it safe and not even say the banks real name but I'll just let ya know it rhymes with Shmifth Shmird and consists of two odd numbers. yep. Suck it bank!
So theres that little hiccup in my life. Theeenn, yes there's more, I go and get an ovulation kit as suggested by my doctor and many other TTC couples. Been doing the little test strips every morning since Thursday (well Thursday was in the afternoon) and none have come back saying there is even a little LH surge. According to all of my charts today is the big O day. I am quite honestly fed up with this whole TTC thing. Really should it be this hard to have a baby? Why can a crackwhore pop out 8 of em and not take care of a single one but I can't even have ONE?!?!
Oh and to top this little cake of dispair off with a lovely cherry bomb, my knitting and crocheting has pretty much ceased to exist. I have no energy or passion anymore it seems. And when I do even try to being a new project, somehow someway I screw it up. Like a tote bag I was working on the other day. I get alooooot of it done and then realize the pattern says that there was an estimated use of 3 skeins of the yarn they used. I had one. Needless to say that was ripped out quite promptly and shoved into some container somewhere in my horrendously messy house.
Told you this blog was going to be a bad one.
Even though my life seems to be a big pile of crap right now I'm trying to take it all in stride and just breathe. Which is hard to do b/c I have bronchitis, but ya know what I mean.
I just hope whatever this slump my life is in, I get out of it quick. Like now!!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

So I'm not that great at this blogging thing...

I have a tendency to kind of forget about it. Not that my life is all to exciting anyway...
I finally finished my first handspun!!! It didn't turn out as well as I had hoped but I kinda like it. I'm in the midst of making a felted/fulled (however you wanna put it) coin purse/clutch w/the yarn. I'm super duper excited about how the whole project will turn out.
The roving before
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and then after spinning...
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The size isn't as consistent as I wanted but oh well... I'm doing much better on my second one that I'm doing now.
Baby updatea: Well there isn't one. As I'm sure you have guessed by now. If I was pregnant then I'm sure I would've told everyone on earth by now. I was so sure that this last time it was going to happen so that made it suck even more when I realized it hadn't. My dr. said today that he wants to do one more round of Clomid and then see where to go from there. I really really do not want to do another cycle of it. If it was going to work I honestly feel that it would've done it's job by now. But on the other hand I also don't want to go to the next step which will be either injections or IUI. I'm sure my insurance doesn't cover even a little bit of either and right now it's impossible to pay for anything more expensive. I'm still in the middle of trying to pay off my hospital bill for the surgery they had to do last year to see what was going on.
I just don't understand how some crack whore on the street can have like 3890 kids but I can't even have one?! I mean really? Agh..frustrated!!!
I'm glad I have spinning to calm me down though...

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Tick tock tick tock

Sooo I turned 23 Sunday! It was the usual birthday of me being all sad b/c it's another year gone by that I haven't had a baby and my birthdays always seem to suck. I made out pretty good tho. I got an 8 ft (7ft maybe?) ALL pink fishing pole and flip bell reel from Clark. I loooove it! Now I can go riverfishing! Mom & Dad made me a nice dinner, breakfast, got me a pretty card, and a nice picture frame. Clark's mom & dad got me an awesome Longaberger recipe card basket, and a pretty picture frame that you can put lots of pictures in. Isaiah (my sweet monkey) got me a green apple scented oil scent dispenser thing (with the reeds, dunno wut they're called), and a shirt. I got lots of cards at work and Clark also bought me a t-shirt from Rav. Which I just got in today so I'm super excited to wear it tonight to SnB. If I go. I have full intentions of going but with the way my mood has been today blah I dunno... I don't wanna be a Debbie Downer ya kno?
I'm just in my own self pity mood. I took a test and got a BFN. I took it a few days too early so I'm still somewhat hopeful but still. I'm reading into IUI and all these different injectables since this will be my last month on Clomid and it's just so unbelievable to think I have to have that kind of assistance to do what billions of women have been doing for how many thousands of years on their own? And of course I'm lucky and get messed up. I feel broken. Can't they just fix me? Preferablly a quick fix?
The only thing I've really ever wanted out of life is to be a mother. And to have that one thing taken away (possibly, I'm a pessimist) sucks...
Told you I was bein Debbie...
I'm gonna test again. Don't know when but just incase. I'm sure you'll hear my rant about that when I get another BFN. I'm just glad I have a few wonderful people to catch me when I fall.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Fingers crossed...

So I had my ultrasound appt. Tuesday. I'm not going to go into details of how it went cuz well I don't know that this is really the place for all the gynecological talk and I certainly don't want to jinx myself, so let's just say it went better then expected. Which at this point is all I can really ask for.
My birthday is in two days which I'm not the least bit excited about that. I'm not old or even getting old by any means but 23 scares me. Plus, it never fails that every year on my birthday something happens to make me cry. Fun eh? At least I know I'll get a good meal or two out of it. And Amanda is being super awesome and we're going to yarn n more to get some fibers or w/e on Wednesday. I just hope she doesn't give me the swine flu she has contracted. =]
I had my first lesson in spinning yesterday! I am officially hooked on it and hope to get good enough to make something worth using. I'm super excited that now I can get some yummy fibers and dye them and make my own preference and spin spin spin till my heart is content... see excited! hehe
Here's the kit I got:
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Cute huh? I especially like that there's a picture of the animal your fibers came from. Mine was from a beauty named Abby.
Gr... time to confirm patients for Monday. Why can't anyone ever just remember their own appointment? To much to ask for huh? Thought so... o well.